Drunk Broad Arrested While Abusing A Duck

Posted: September 26 @ 3:30pm by 610 in Bolivian
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[Santa Cruz]  Authorities were called to the 700 block of 41st Avenue Saturday afternoon for reports of an intoxicated woman abusing a duck. According to a Santa Cruz Sheriff’s Office, deputies received a call that a woman was drunk and was refusing to leave a business just after 4 p.m. The caller also said the woman was throwing a duck to the ground and apparently also trying to strangle it with some sort of leash. When officers arrived at the scene, deputies found an intoxicated woman throwing the duck around. It was not immediately known whether the duck was wild or domesticated, or if it was the woman’s pet. The woman, whose name has not yet been released, was taken to County Jail on charges of public intoxication while deputies tried to catch the duck. Deputies said Saturday that the animal appeared to be uninjured, but they planned to take it to the Santa Cruz County Animal Shelter for evaluation.

First bears, now ducks.  At least this broad was fighting fair though.  I don’t think I have the skills to actually get a hold of a duck with my bare hands to toss a leash on it, especially when I’m three sheets to the wind.  This lady was all banged up at 4 in the afternoon kicking some feathered ass.  If this duck is gonna pop off at the beak & quack some shit about how drunk this bitch is, laughing at how she’s slurring and stumbling, don’t be looking to bystanders for help when you’re getting choked the fuck out.  Seriously, if you can’t just waddle side-to-side & avoid this cunt until she faceplants then you deserve to be swung around like a lasso and smashed to the ground.  An asshole is an asshole, no matter what size or species.  So if you’re capable of getting your mitts on a douchebag duck, feel free to fuck him up.

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