Fuck yeah, Jack! You showed that snooty twat! I’m boring? BORING? How’s an art gallery, kitchen, and Alicia Keys concert BY MYSELF for boring!?!?
Lame, bro. When Lauren said “you’re boring” that means two things – cocaine & anal. Cocainal. Anyone who knows anything knows that. Whether it’s with her or hookers doesn’t really matter just as long as you’re dancing with the white devil & the brown eye. You had to see this coming, Jack. The golden rule of seeing a break-up on the horizon because you’re a depressing human being is to at least change the reasoning to “out of control asshole”. Morph into the gacked out boyfriend with an insatiable appetite for starfish. What you don’t do is extract your revenge by trading in ThankYou points to beat off to Marilyn Monroe or be the solo freak backstage sending Alicia creepy vibes. Unless the point of the commercial was to give a glimpse into the life of a post-relationship serial rapist. Is that what you were doing in your dimly lit apartment? Target scouting? Jack looks more like a Dexter victim than a dude living life to the fullest. I guess if that’s the case, he’s definitely not boring. Perhaps I stand corrected.
Cocainal. New favorite word.
Oh my god, it’s like you’re in my brain.