One thing I hate more in this world than racism and affirmative action, is fucking cheap fucks. Can’t stand the sight of them, fucking alligator arms motherfuckers. These are 3 tips you can use to identify a cheap fuck, brought to you by the one and only blackdude.
1. They always chew half a stick of Juicy fruit gum. Dude , a pack comes with 5 sticks of gum that cost you $0.35 cents you cheap motherfucker. Buy three packs, still wont cost you a dollar. You know what you can get for a dollar these days? A fucking heart attack sandwich, also know as the buck double from Burger King.
2. Refills bottled water with tap water. Yeah I just don’t get this, don’t people who drink bottled water in public, do it to be part of the In Crowd, by in crowd, liberal college student, ? What gives, why the fuck are you re using that bottle, you get a 24 pack for $4.99. comes out to it being about $0.20 per bottle, cheaper then the gum you bough you cheap fuck.
3. Orders the most expensive shit on the menu and then when the check comes, says split it even between everyone. This person reminds me of my boy, when we go out, he will fucking order a lobster mac and cheese, ill get a chicken wings.Then the next thing i know I am paying $30 for wings that cost $8.99. How does that work out? Then when I leave a $3 tip for my portion of the meal, he has the audacity to call me a cheap fuck because I didn’t want to put in a $20 tip. If someone is quick to call you a cheap fuck, usually the are the cheapest person around. Gets me going man
P.S. If you have any other tips, drop them off in the comment section, note you don’t need to provide an email address or anything, and if you re going to be racist, please at least be funny about it. I know, I know the blog wasn’t that funny, but shit like this gets my blood pressure the roof, had to vent and shit. I can be great all the time, Im not Jesus,so in closing, fuck you if you have no love for me.